Lesbian Vampire Killers

Girls, gore and garlic - horror-comedy hardly comes more enjoyable (and forgettable) than the aptly-titled "Lesbian Vampire Killers", which does what it says on the tin over and over again for almost 90 hollow minutes with no attempt at any sort of lasting cinematic memory, except perhaps for the DVD release which will be a hot item for guilty indulgence.

A holiday weekend in Wales for British TV's "Gavin and Stacey" James Corden and Matthew Horne turn into a bloodsucking bonanza for Sapphic sirens, the order of the day in a remote village where every young girl turns into a vampire on their 18th birthday. Jimmy (Horne) is here because he's trying hard to get over his impossibly difficult girlfriend Judy (Lucy Gaskell) and Fletch (Corden) tags along because he's just been fired as a promo clown. It isn't long before they are introduced to the four visiting foreign students on an assignment - Heidi, Trudi (Scotland's Mulheron sisters Tiffany and Ashley), Lotte (MyAnna Buring, "The Descent") and Anke (Louise Dylan). Throw in a vampire-killer vicar (Paul McGann, "Withnail And I") and Queen Vampire Carmilla (beautiful Silvia Colloca) and you get an adventure fit for slackers, pervos and mind-numbed teens who'd pay good money to sit through any poor excuse of a plot just to see what these characters will do to one another.

There isn't a better short summary than to say that "Lesbian Vampire Killers" is a stylised B-grade feature with great special effects deserving of a more important movie. Most critics reviewed this negatively as a missed opportunity, considering its promising movie title and cross-genre appeal. It has one or two laugh-out-loud moments of crude humour but mostly it's a passing popcorn movie. |